Easter Horror Finds

Today, I was feeling nostalgic for my childhood. You know, all the chocolate bunnies and marshmallow eggs (and the newly discovered chocolate covered Peep...heaven), egg hunts, and my little sister bawling her eyes out every time my mother tried to get her to sit on the Easter Bunny's knee for pictures. Honestly, who can blame her? A giant bunny is a scary thing...and why does he always have giant teeth? The two buck teeth may be cute, or the better to eat the children with...

Of course, I thought I couldn't be alone in finding some of the more secular Easter imagery more than a little creepy. As it turns out, there are several horror movies with the Easter season theme. Here are my picks:

1) The Critters movies



This movie series did for Easter what Gremlins did for Christmas. I love how the sequel openly attacks the bunny. Like I said, I can't be the only one who found the giant rabbit creepy...

2) Monty Python and the Holy Grail



Okay, this is not a horror movie nor is it explicitly Easter themed (except for the, you know, Holy Grail part), but this might explain where my fear of the Easter bunny came from.

3) Donnie Darko



Again, not exactly horror, but this scene still freaks me out. Scariest bunny I have ever seen in a movie, hands down!

4) The Wicker Man



This film (the 1973 original, not the Nicolas Cage remake) is still to this day one of my favorite horror movies. It actually lends itself very nicely to the pagan roots of Easter, especially the celebration of Spring. Creepy, creepy stuff.

5) The Night of the Lepus



I've never actually seen this film, but it is on my list to watch now. Come on, rabbits turned killers? I love movies where mother nature fights back. Makes me all teary eyed for the first time I saw that tree scene in The Evil Dead.  Ahh, memories...

Happy Easter egg hunting everyone!

Oh, and if you see me around, congratulate me on running my first 5K! Yay, me!!

John 3:16

For All You Bleeding Hearts Out There...

You knew I wouldn't let you down.

Not today of all days.

People giving their hearts to one another; everyone decked out in the color of blood...I can't think of any holiday with imagery as gory as Valentine's Day.

Here's a few films to help you remember the true meaning of the holiday:
 

Valentine (2001), starring David Boreanaz and Denise Richards

I only wish this movie had been half as creepy as the trailer. It's pretty much your typical, glossy, Scream wannabe, PG13 horror film. Not horrible, but completely forgettable.

I much prefer...



My Bloody Valentine 3D (2009), starring Jensen Ackles (need I say more?)

I loved almost everything about this remake...and not just Mr. Ackles (sigh).  One of the few times I've liked the remake more than the original. This movie was just pure fun. It didn't take itself too seriously. It had the perfect mix of humor and horror. It made good use of fake blood and cheap scares. The 3D aspect just amplified the enjoyment. A popcorn flick at its very best.

Here's the original, in case you missed it:



This was the trailer from the original 1981 movie. Honestly, this is just one of the many horror movies that followed the formula set by Friday the 13th (1980). Still, not a bad movie to watch if you're in the mood for that sort of thing.

Maybe zombies are more your thing?

How about zombies in love? Be still my not-beating heart...



Boy Eats Girl (2005)

I actually saw this one on television recently...on SyFy, I think? Or Chiller? Decent film, but if you really want quality horror, read on...




Roman (2006), starring Lucky McKee and Kristen Bell (Dir. Angela Bettis, Written by Lucky McKee)

This film snuck up on me. Yes, on one level it is a great horror film: boy meets girl, boy obsesses over girl, boy kills girl and keeps her body around in his apartment.

But on another level, I don't even feel comfortable calling it "horror." As with most of what McKee and Bettis do, there is something hauntingly and painfully human about this film. Every character has a place in my heart. I feel for them in a way that I don't usually when I watch horror films. The film stuck with me. I've watched it many times, and I still find new things about it that I like. Just watch it.

Feeling warm and fuzzy yet?



May (2002), starring Angela Bettis, Jeremy Sisto, and Anna Farris (Dir./Writer Lucky McKee)

It's really the universal story, isn't it? After all, we are all just searching for our "perfect mate"? Isn't that what Valentine's Day is really about?

Believe it or not, there were too many Valentine's Day horror movies to list here. I guess there is just something about this holiday that brings out the inner psycho in all of us. Only one question now...

What will hubby and I watch tonight to celebrate?

Kiss Me At Midnight....

Merry Christmas To All...

...and to all a good (and gruesome) night!

Oh, how I do love themed-horror movies, particularly when it is Christmastime.

My last post gave you numbers 10-6 of my list of favorite Christmas horror movies. Here are the top five:

5. Thomas Kinkade's Christmas Cottage



Thomas Kinkade, the painter of light! Oh, the horror, the horror! Oh, that red scarf that Jared Padalecki wears around his neck! I must cover my eyes! ( Don't worry, Jared Padalecki, we will still watch you on Supernatural; just don't submit us to this again).

Ok, this isn't really horror, but I had to include it. A random killer hacking his way through this movie might be an improvement.
4. Silent Night, Bloody Night (1974)


Because where else would you be on Christmas Eve other than a mansion turned mental asylum?

3. Christmas Evil



This film is really a cautionary tale for all would-be parents who are thinking of lying to their children about Santa. I mean, really, who thought telling children that Santa is real was a good idea? Who thought the little ones wouldn't be scarred when they realized it was just Dad dressed up in a fake beard and red suit?

2. P2 



I almost didn't include this movie, but I did find it creepy. It was suspenseful at moments, and just a good, overall film, especially when you consider it is really just a cast of two actors in one location (a parking garage). The Christmas Eve setting is almost secondary, but it is necessary to the plot. After all, how else could you explain an empty office building? Plus, the dinner scene between the kidnapper and his captive woman is just eerie. The Christmas decorations, the food, the music all just added to the atmosphere. Overall, an enjoyable movie.

1. Elves [VHS] (1989)



I have to admit I've never seen this movie; I've never even heard of this movie. But it looks AWESOME! A Nazi experiment gone wrong! Murderous elves! Grizzly Adams! What more could you ask for in a Christmas horror film?

And so concludes my list of holiday horror. There were many, many more I could've included, but that would have messed up my nice and tidy list of ten (plus, I need to leave a few for next year).

Seriously, though, I hope you enjoyed this list as much as I did. And I hope you are enjoying your holiday season.

Luke 2:14: "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men."

It's Christmas Eve and You Know What That Means...

lTHE CHRISTMAS HORROR MOVIE LIST!!!

Or at least Part I, anyway.

So, dust off your Santa hat, hang your stockings (by the chimney with care, of course), and snuggle in with some hot cocoa...

I've already given you a little sneak peak of the first three in previous entries:

10. Gremlins

9. Jack Frost

8. Black Christmas (1974)

NOTE: I know they remade Black Christmas a few years ago, but as much as I love Buffy's Michelle Trachtenberg, I still like to watch the original. I mean, it is absolutely classic 1970's horror. The villain gets absolutely no back story. The plot consists of only a madman killing young women at Christmas. Throw in a little of that day-glo red blood and some well-placed moans and groans (mostly from the killer) and you've got a fun, popcorn horror flick that is bad in the very best way possible.

7. Don't Open 'Til Christmas (1984)


 
Teehee...this movie trailer makes me giggle. Doesn't it just look like such a Grindhouse movie that it almost doesn't even look real?
It's almost as if it is a parody of itself, but it isn't! I cannot even tell you what I love  most. Maybe it's the premise: a serial killer who only kills Santas. Hmmmm....have we found a precursor to our favorite specialized serial killer, Dexter? Or maybe it's the random, glittery Disco music in the middle of all the mayhem. I don't know, but I like it.

6. Silent Night, Deadly Night



Here's another goodie courtesy of the 1980's. This one is from 1984 too...that Christmas must have been horrific. I love the title, a lovely take on a classic carol. And those animatronic elves are enough to give anyone nightmares. The trailer itself isn't the best, but I absolutely love the film's taglines. Here are a few from IMDB:
You've made it through Halloween, now try and survive Christmas

---

Santa's Here!

---

He knows when you've been naughty

---

Shocking... disturbing... The movie they tried to ban.

---

If "A Nightmare on Elm Street" gave you sleepless nights, or if "Halloween" made you jump in every shadow or if every "Friday the 13th" was more frightening that the others... THEN BEWARE!

That's right...beware the holiday-themed horror movie!!


These should be enough to get you through the night. Check back tomorrow for the continuation of the list! Oh, and watch out for fat men trying to sneak into your house tonight. Santa is not always so jolly...

See you tomorrow!

Can Corey Feldman Save Christmas?

Never let them eat after midnight!

Heehee... I had to include this in my favorite films of the Christmas season. I don't know if it is truly "horror," but it scared the living daylights out of me as a child. It really does not get much better than this. Gizmo, Pheobe Cates, Corey Feldman...need I say more?

Not only is the movie set during Christmas, it also serves as a cautionary tale for all would be Santas out there.

Don't remember what I'm talking about? Allow me to refresh your memory...



A few things a love about that scene:

1) Pretty sure that's an urban legend I've heard before

2) Gizmo shows more emotion than the boyfriend

3) The "subtlety" of the word Christmas shown in shadow along the back wall

Hope y'all are getting ready for Christmas...only a few more days for my full list of Christmas horror flicks. Coming Christmas Eve...

Another One to Put in Your Stocking...

Remember Shannon Elizabeth from American Pie? This was one of her early films.

And let me tell you...it is brilliant.

Ok, so the makers of this film do bill it as a horror/comedy. I guess I can give them some credit for not taking this movie so seriously, but...come on, really? A snowman? I get that dolls can be creepy. I definitely understand the ick factor of the clown. But a snowman?

I guess I just never understood the terror of something that could be defeated by a sunny day.

Oh, well. This is still enjoyable as an incredibly bad holiday horror movie.

What's even funnier is that it looks like they used the same snowman from that Michael Keaton movie of the same name. You know, the one where the father dies and he comes back as a snowman to help his family? I ask you...why wasn't that a horror movie plot?

But I'm getting off topic. Back to this Jack Frost.

If you want more, I dare you to go to YouTube and look up the bathtub scene from this movie. It does for bubble baths what The Evil Dead did for trees.

Enjoy!!

Oh, and a full list of Christmas-themed horror flicks to come...

Black Christmas (1974) Full Trailer

Well, kiddos, it's that time of year again.

Bright lights, shiny tinsel on the tree...or is that just the glint from the knife in the serial killer's hand? It is so hard to tell.

Keeping with what is quickly becoming a tradition, I am compiling a list of appropriately holiday-themed horror movies. This one is a personal favorite. I know they remade it a few years ago, but I still prefer the original 1974 version. In fact, I have been known to show Black Christmas and White Christmas back-to-back. I call it, wait for it, wait for it...

Gray Christmas!

Ok, maybe that title needs some work.

Speaking of work, I need to get back to mine. Enjoy this little taste of the blog entry that will come next week...the horror films of Christmas.

Season's Greetings...and watch out for those strange men looking to get into your house via the chimney. You never know which one has the gifts to fill your stocking and which one has the gore-streaked knife waiting to get you while you sleep. [Insert evil laugh here.]

Happy Holidays!

Because Only a Day Spent with Family Could Inspire Such Violence...

Okay, maybe that's a little overly dramatic. The truth is I really enjoy Thanksgiving. I like the whole "Norman Rockwell" feel to the day. I like the dinner with the entire family around the big table. I like the crisp Autumn air (although as I type this, it is a muggy 76° outside, but a girl can dream), and most of all, I love the food. Fried turkey (yes, I said fried...deep fried Cajun-style, actually), cornbread dressing, broccoli salad, pumpkin pie...wow, I'm making myself hungry now. 

I also love the traditions of the horror movies that this holiday season inspires. Yes, there are Thanksgiving horror movies. 

Everyone knows about Eli Roth's fake trailer in the film Grindhouse Presents, Death Proof - Extended and Unrated (Two-Disc Special Edition) (which I heard was to be made into a real movie...but who knows). Brilliant. 

WARNING: The videos below include nudity, violence, and foul language. Cover the kiddo's eyes, please!

Though not as numerous as the other holiday horror movies (Christmas for some odd reason really brings out the murderous maniacs in horror films), there are a few real horror movies.

I give you ThanksKilling (2009)!



It is so awesomely bad that this year a second one was released. The tag line? He always comes back for seconds!

Need more? Why not try Thanxgiving (2006)?



Still hungry? Feeling nostalgic for the gritty feel of the 1970's horror film? BLOOD FREAK ~ TERA ANDERSON, DANA CULLIVAN, BOB CURRIER, AND DOLORES CURRIER 1972 is for you!



I really don't have anything to say about that one...except WOW. Okay, moving on.

Here's a few more:
Home Sweet Home (1981)

Children of the Corn (1984) Not really Thanksgiving, but corn can be just as creepy as turkey...

Icons of Horror Collection - Sam Katzman (The Giant Claw / Creature with the Atom Brain / Zombies of Mora Tau / The Werewolf) (1957) The monster in The Giant Claw will make you think twice about turkey.

BIRDEMIC - Shock and Terror (2008) Turkey-like vultures attack!

And finally a piece of pumpkin pie for dessert: The Pumpkin Karver (2006)

Enjoy your Thanksgiving! Remember what you're truly thankful for...and have fun!!